If you are in downtown Paris and need to cross the street, move with the herd. That is the only way to cross a downtown street in Paris and live to see the other side. Try to stay in the middle of the pack. It is the safest place for you. French drivers will never attack the herd as a whole.

This is because even though Parisians, when behind the wheel get crazy upon the realization of the superior tactical advantage that being there gives them over mere pedestrians, they also realize that direct, forceful attack against such a large group might inadvertently result in some personal injury to themselves.

So when the herd moves, they stop, lay back, churn out hydrocarbons and wait for the central portion to pass so they can then pick off all the young, old, sick and weak stragglers. I hope some of you who may considering visiting Paris for the first time find this information useful and live to tell about it. Feel free if you wish to corroborate my well-intentioned offering with anyone who has visited Paris before.